While I live amongst a community of fascinating writers and bloggers, all committed to their writing, I find myself unable to keep up with the daily record of my thoughts and interactions. I am not exactly sure why this is. Depending on my mood, I like to assign it different sources.
1. I just have more of a social life than others, therefore I can't spend time crafting a text post for the public to read/enjoy/dislike/waste their time on. (As you can see, this comes from an insecurity in and of myself and my writing, aimed at many other well meaning writers in an attempt to make myself look/feel better.)
2. I am a terrible writer, and very unmotivated. (While this is incredibly cynical, I cannot think that it is entirely false. I AM very unmotivated. Reality: I spend hours on the computer a day, yet I devote none of them to organizing and publishing my thoughts, or working on my writing.)
3. I am too busy with school. (While this sounds similar to #1 at a first glance, I would hope that my readers can discern the difference. The background thought is still the same, that I have better things to do, yet those better things come from a different source and, fortunately, do not bear insult to my colleagues. Another reality: I don't spend nearly as much time on school as I should.)
Now I hope to be able to sift through these reasons and come to an accurate conclusion, despite my faulty premises. I am inclined to believe that I simply lack the motivation to exercise a little bit of effort in order to craft a piece of writing that is, let's say, above par.
Since I've bored you all with my rant, subsequently attempting to excuse my lack of posts since last semester, I will continue on to real things.
I once was of the sort that severely (and I mean that in the fullest sense of the word) enjoyed physical, written word. By that I mean a book. Paper. Bound. Shiny covers. Smell of newsprint. Stiff new pages versus bent, dog eared pages. The magic of the story was complemented by its feeling in my hands. Not to say that I have completely discarded these feelings of physical reading, but I have recently acquired a Kindle Touch. (By acquired, I mean that my loving, ever longsuffering, and wonderful boyfriend has purchased it for me <3) For a long time, I thought that getting an e-reader would completely tarnish my reputation as a true book lover. How could I ever discard that loyalty to other authors? Now I don't necessarily know if I truly AM discarding this loyalty, but nevertheless, I have been able to get past these feelings and use a Kindle.
Now to the real part. I LOVE MY KINDLE. It is seriously the best investment that has been made on my behalf. I have the majority of my school reading in one place, meaning it ACTUALLY GETS DONE as opposed to being blown off because I don't really feel like carrying all my heavy books around. I have unlimited access to books (many of them free; thanks, Amazon), available at the touch of a screen. I've spent more time reading (academic and recreational) than I have since last summer. That's saying a lot. I believe that reading, of all sorts, is essential to the mind and well being of the individual. Now, I have that opportunity.
In other news, I have gone through about half of the semester without breaking my computer! This is incredible news, and I hope it is received with love and congratulations. I am very proud of myself. Also, Macbooks are exponentially more durable than Acers.
As far as academics go, I believe I have improved. On both of my recent history tests, I improved by 10% compared to last semesters averages. This is PROGRESS. For once in my life, I worked harder and actually accomplished something. Excuse me while I float on a cloud.
I understand that this post is lacking much NEW information on my life, and rather a lot of rambling and stream-of-consciousness thoughts, still I hope it is enjoyed. In the future, I am going to make a concentrated effort to be motivated in writing OFTEN and REGULARLY.
And so we go.
